Sunday, 19 October 2008

Shite day

ok guys I've gotta tell you all that I am SEETHING.

Life has been really good to me recently and I know that I am a very lucky man (apart from at poker). I have been winning LOADS OF MONEY at 25p/50p over the last week and a bit.

Then the day from hell happens.
Friday night I went round my mates house and we grinded the tables from around 6pm to 10am the following morning. I won £200 in this time. Saturday Morning Kitchen came on and we decided to call it a night. I love that show. I'd just won £200 and I was watching Saturday Morning Kitchen on a 42" PLASMA TV with a good friend of mine. LIFE COULDN'T GET ANY BETTER...

BUT... IT COULD GET A LOT WORSE.

I left my mates house after Saturday Morning Kitchen and went to the local tesco metro to buy some energy juice as I had no sleep in 36 hours. I was looking in the fridges for my fave 6 cans of Red Bull.... I asked the young asian chap who worked there where the Red Bull was... he said they didn't have any in. I WAS FUMING. Who the fuck did this guy think he was to talk to me like that??? I ASKED HIM IF THEY HAD ANY BANNANAS AND HE SAID "YES OVER THERE", I GAVE HIM A SLAP AND LEFT IT AT THAT. FUCKING RETARD.

So, I had to settle for Relentless (shit, has anyone tried it before?). Then to my disgust.... when I get to the till... who geets me other than a dirty POLISH CUNT-BAG SLUT. I told her to shave her moustache a left it at that.

So by this time I'm pretty tilted so I jump in my car and drive home to grab my ticket and head off up north to the match. I'm on my way to the game and my car starts making strange noises... nothing new there I think to myself. Then.... BOOOOM. Something explodes out of no where. The engine stops so I pull over to the side of the motorway. I phone up the AA because I dont have a clue about cars and the indian fuckwhit on the other end of the phone tells me it will take between 2 and 3 hours for a mechanic to come look at my car. WHAT A FUCKING JOKE. To cut a long story short this country is going to shit because of all these fucking foreigners coming in and taking all of our jobs.... then doing a totally shit job. WHEN THE MECHANIC FINALLY GOT THERE AND I SAW THAT HE WAS BLACK..... I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF AND GOT A TAXI TO MIDDLESBROUGH AND SAW THE LAST 4 MINUTES OF THE GAME. I MISSED ALL THE GOALS FFS.

THIS WAS ONE OF THE WORST DAYS OF MY LIFE. ON A PAR WITH WHEN MY MUM CHUCKED ME OUT THE HOUSE AND I HAD TO EAT TOMATOE SAUCE SACHES FOR 4 DAYS UNTILL MY MONEY GOT PAID INTO MY BANK BY WILLIAM HILLS.

what a fucking joke

i was so tilted i didnt play yesterday (first day off in 3 years)

anyway, I URGE PEOPLE TO READ THIS SITE, THEY HAVE SOME VERY GOOD IDEAS BUT PEOPLE JUST SEE THE NAME AND JUDGE. PLEASE EVERYONE JUST GIVE THE BNP A CHANCE.

PLAONIC_

25 comments:

Platonic_ said...

AND GAZ BILLINGHAM

I WILL FIGHT YOU AND TIME/PLACE

Anonymous said...

I always wondered why you were such a thick cunt but now i know you support the Filth I understand it all

Freddy said...

Right up to the point where you posted the link I was laughing at this.
Ironic post I thought.
Bit like Al Murray in Pub landlord persona I thought.
Don't put him down because he's a Chelski fan I thought, he's actually quite amusing.
But you meant it didn't you?

Balti1112 said...

fredy are you gay?

looking for gay players for gays only home game.

ok ty

xx

Anonymous said...

Platonic_ you are really bad at poker. I mean really really bad.

Anonymous said...

100% Cunt

platonic said...

hi guys managed to scrape £95 of the dole today back to 25p 50p again. dont tell the social im making all this money my life will be over!!!

Anonymous said...

racist, unfunny, cunt.

batman22 said...

that is absoloutly disgraceful plat me and u are gonna have words!! im not black but i havent had a wash for quite some months now and starting to turn that way so leave me alone!!

clownia27 said...

im gay im bent my arse is up for rent

houchen1 said...

platonic havin a day off?bollocks

Anonymous said...

we know clownia i see you hanging about tollcross with aiden mcgeady ya wee rent boy tosser.

ownyoursoul said...

Platonic_: well 15 get comfy whle ya can
15ti1000: wht does tht mean?
Platonic_: i will be crusing 1/2 by febuary
Platonic_: missed ya freebies at the 10/20 so i gta start movig up to get me fee money again.
Platonic_: oh come on you can not pull that one
Razor666: platonic
Razor666: y play so low
Platonic_: anyway 4 months and i will be back to take

jimmmy01 said...

i have a fantastic social life

Anonymous said...

is joyces baby dead yet?

jenka said...

Sick bastard

Anonymous said...

loooool seriously a fucking funny post!

GB said...

pmsl Platonic why do you want to fight me?

derek said...

yeah cunt face never mind hiding behind fuckin anonymous you sad fucker lets be out in the open you cunt so i can hunt you down and give you a smile for life .

i happen to know joyce ya prick.

come on lets have a party??

platonic_ said...

it would be a 3 hit case boiled ham.

i hit you

you hit the ground

the ambulance hits 90

now fuck off from my blog you penis.

eat my sh1t and die!

Anonymous said...

you are such a dumb simple bastard, i cant believe you buy into that bnp shite.

went on their website, their policies are so fucking stupid its unreal. they say they wanna stop imports and get british people working in factories/doing crafts again. dumb fucks have absolutely no idea of how the economy works.
thank fuck the bnp will NEVER get into power.

you are a pathetic lonely cunt, your only chance of sex, let alone a girlfriend, is with your mums mangled cunt (probably mangled from being a slut). the bnp, 25/50p poker and this blog is pretty much the only thing you have in life. hahahaha, you fucking loser.

jimmmmy01 said...

Justin033 should get a life and not be on here 24/7

tinyjoyce said...

The only person who should be dead is the sick ass hole that put that on there!!! GROW THE FUCK UP AND PICK ON SOMEONE URE OWN FUCKING SIZE INSTEAD OF A LITTLE BABY YOU SICK ****!!

batman22 said...

SALE NOW ON TO ALL GAY GUYS!!!!
blow jobs at 50p each rather then the £1 i usually charge!!
anal sex is 75p rather then the £1.50 i usually charge.
bondage 25p and if u want me to give it to u i will pay you £5.
any offers call me!!
regards ure local rent boy!!

jenka said...

Very well said Joyce,and im sure everyone agrees with you