Fish

so i wen4t to casin tonite wenkt to thecasino strsight after the chelsea game todau and was pl,aing my ussal £1/2 game. got FUCKIN RAPED bad bad afeter bad beat. long story shot i lost over 10 buy ins in 45minuite so decide to have a drink tyo try to calm down,,,, pepopoloe at table and up buying me drinks because i wasthinkingofleaving. lolst another 6 buy ins so ive lost the most ever in one day i dunno wtf im gonna do

i came home to try and win it all back online but i got no funds anmd my debit card isnt letting me deposut,,,

i feel online is my game and i have a proven trak recrd of winning online, just dunno if ill have the funds to play with so basically the hole point of this post was to ask anyone out there to lend me perhps £200to400 to get me on my feet, l will play it back ofcourse as quick as i can, when i make just £200 i will pay back the full amount

i know some rich guys sometims read my blog so please give me a chance

ty, im not one to beg but i really need some help right now

Live poker story

Went to play my usual low key 1/1 cash game at the Vic last night, trying to avoid the autograph hunters that read my blog.

Live poker is one of the few places i can still let my hair down so to speak. Anway, I sit down and quickly notice a newbie is giving it the big I am splashing his chips around and giviing the staff grief.

Obviously this is nothing new and I think little of it other than to try and stamp my authority on the table with some loose play and a few verbals and banter

Matey boy shows his true colours when not tipping the waitress as she gave him a dirty look when he grabbed her buttocks. She's a good mate of mine so I told him he was bang out order. From another table his mate , a guy who was twice as fat as me, starting to goad me, I want to be your friend PLATONIC etc.
He too, ordered a pint and the waitress's boyfriend made sure his pint had a good "head", lol.

Anyway, bingo bago bongo tight wadd gruffnut is all in and I look down at aces. I slowroll him as Im fuming by now before making the call.

He is so excited he flips up his kings like the newbie he is. I keep my cards covered knowing I just have to dodge a king or diamond on the river to scoop.
The river is a blank but I remember a tip my actor mate, Bepe gave me and told him his hand was good and to pay him up. His face lit , and using all my acting skill i told him I was lying a pulled the monster stack my way showing my bullets.

His gargantuan friend from the other table went bezerk and came waddling over, but his headphones wires caught on his chair in a comedy monment as he still had an old stylee personal cd player (with, would you believe Banarama on it). It was classic stuff, we had such a laugh ripping him to shreds, Banafingrama i ask you!
Moral: TIP THE WAITRESS GRUFFNUT!

Update

Hi guys sorry not updated in a while. I've had some problems with Hills and have had my account locked for nearly a month now so haven't yet played on iPoker. I'm pleased to tell you I have had some great sucess playing live. I've been playing the £1/£1 game at the Vic and over the past month I've won around £15,000. These guys there are such fish.

I've got an amusing story from last night that I will post in a bit, I'm off to the pub for a bit.

SOLIED UNDERWEAR

Gruffnuts,

To cater to popular demand(im regular bein asked at tables),i have agreed to sell my soiled underwear,rangin from naturally aged to freshly soiled(state your preference when ordering)

Fuck the lot of ya,

Plat

Gruffnuts

Thanks for your comments i love you all.

Ive been having a bad run lately due to arse munching fucking faggots like $bankjob$ who always lands a river and totaly fucks me and my never ending roll. So im piping down and getting ready for the big 1 which i feel is just round the corner.

Fuck balmore and look out Gulkiness u tilted spunk breathing orval drinking batty boy.

peace out, Platonic_

I'LL BE BACK

Gruffnuts,

Im shaggin em faster than u can drag em from underneath me at the moment,so only a short post this time.

Ok,so ive had a fall,it happens,ill bounce back in no time at all,any gruffnut who thinks ive lost my skills,just come play me and ill show u who the gruffnut is.

One other thing,ive been asked a few times lately,why do i have such a huge followin from the homosexual/bisexual poker community,well to be honest,i really dont know.I'm actually straight but have occasionally done man on man experimental stuff,but i havent disclosed these activities before.

Anyway:

Fuck off the lot of you,

Platonic_

KOLLEGA BREAKS HIS 3 YEAR SILENCE

Gruffnuts,

I've been watchin the higher stakes games a bit lately to prepare me for them(i'll be there by summer),and 2 nights ago,got shock of my life,KOLLEGA sits down at Balmores £500 nl table,sits out for a bit,then leaves.Very suprising.

Anyway,then last night he joins a 6max £500 nl table,and verbally attacks Balmore saying "stop telling everyone how i play" "ok?" "ok?",after several "lol" from Balmore who i got the impression was fallin outa his seat laughin,he states "ive said what i came to say"and left.He also said "i bet u never thought i had £500 in my account did u?"prior to that,which made about as much sense as his 1-dimensional nitty poker play.

KOLLEGA,heres a fact: EVERYONE KNOW HOW YOU PLAY,its legendary,you stand out a mile.You play all pairs and AK and thats it! 9% of hands which i think is the lowest VPIP % on Crypto,and u think people dont notice? IDIOT!

Anyway,back to the important stuff,im winnin like fuck as usual,and Gulkines seems to not be around lately soon as he heard i raised the funs to play him.

Ok,a quick shag then back on the tables,

Fuck u all,
Plat